I'm not a fan of the term "dry drunk" either. I've noticed that it is commonly used within the rooms of AA, and - unfortunately - is often used to refer to someone who is no longer attending AA, but is still sober. When it is used this way, it reflects to me a bias against other methods of sobriety. There are plenty of people on this site who made a powerful personal decision not to drink, and have never had a drink since that moment. While they may not belong to any groups or go to therapy, this doesn't mean that they aren't living lives of personal growth or that their sobriety is comprimised in any way.
I've met plenty of folks who do attend meetings, work a program, go to therapy, etc., but who still get high from anger, respond to situations in limited ways, lie, abuse, take advantage of, etc. You couldn't accuse them of being "dry drunks" because they are "in recovery."
I believe that everyone has the capacity to change behaviors, whether sober or drinking, but that choosing sobriety opens doors to possibility of really shifting the way we respond to things. Conversely, there are stubborn, cranky, and abusive people out there who will likely stay that way whether they get sober or use recovery resources...