This nonsense that I've started back up again stops today. I cannot handle drinking and I certainly am not in control. So back to basics. I just did the AVRT crash course again. I let the beast in and it's kicking my ass and making me into a person that I don't like. I got drunk last night and fought with my boyfriend.... said things that I shouldn't have said. My son heard us and got very upset and was crying. I am an ******* of the highest caliber. I hate myself today and wish that I hadn't started drinking again. I love my family and I don't want to hurt them. Fcuk alcohol!! Evil destructive poison!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HG7I4oniOyA