I'm a 29 year old female on my second attempt at sobriety. I found it funny how you said that sometimes we believe we 'earned' ourselves a drink because we deserve it or because we "worked hard". That was exactly my situation to a tee. Every single drink I consumed was because I earned it. I have been a teacher for 5 years and recently switched over to teaching special Ed at the high school level, which is an absolute thankless profession most of the time (but I love what I do, don't get me wrong). Every day I came home mentally exhausted and headed straight for that bottle of wine because 'I had a long day'. Granted I would only drink 2 glasses a night, maybe 3, but come Friday night forget it. It was usually 2-3 bottles. I would get so drunk Friday and Saturday that Sunday I would withdraw for hours and get so violently sick that it made me swear off drinking every time. Tremors, migraines, vomiting, etc... I always said I would never drink again. There were absolutely gorgeous days I missed from being in bed all day, or having to cancel really fun plans with friends and family. Of course that didn't stop me.... I kept at it for a few more years. It wasn't until I reconnected with my extended family (who I had withdrawn from for some years) and they saw my dark side. This past thanksgiving I got so inilated I made a complete embarrassment out of myself by behaving like I would at a college frat party. Sitting on grandmas lap, dancing on tables, cursing at my aunts. Absolutely embarrassing and shameful. But that's not really what stopped me... It was the fact that they reached out to me afterward and gave me their full support. No one criticized, no one blamed or came down on me for my behavior, they just wanted to be there. My mom said to me "I will always love you, I just want my daughter back". It was that moment that I knew I had to stop.. That I do have people in my corner and support. I wanted to prove to them and myself that I could beat this addiction, and so far so good. Sometimes we just need to be reminded that there is a reason to quit drinking. That we do have people on our side and we aren't battling it alone. I know it's hard for us 20-something's to cope with because all of our friends are drinking and it's almost second nature, but it's not worth it. We are not like them, us and alcohol do not mix and as unfortunate as that is at times I think we are much better off without it.
