Iam so grateful for all your replies and your support gives me comfort!
Thankyou for sharing your heartaches!
We are all in the same boat here
loving someone who rejects us and rebels against us.
I didnt want to fix my boyfriend or control him
He knew all along I wanted a hug with him and everything would be better
His hugs felt like Id been given some drug
I have been having dreams about us though very very vague
I need to vent so I dont tell him like I originally did tell him exactly what I thought of him.
This would annoy him and call me a physcho and then I would never have a chance of him being alone and thinking nice of me and how much he misses me as I want him to know how mean he is.
He will not know this till he self reflects
Although he will drown in alcohol and try for other women
He is such a clown when drunk he will find it difficult
When we met he was sober and drove
I didnt realize till the past week that all my boyfriends and hubby were alcoholics
I knew they shared something and I thought that was Narcissism
Today when I woke I was realizing how he tricked me to real me in and bring me to the stage of "intense" so he said and "psycho bitch"
It was all a trick
The constant texting to me and asking where Iam when I didnt reply quick
The daily phonecalls
The huge hugs love and kissing attention
All a trick
Then he backs off
He gets validation
Maybe he has a couple of women at a time crying for him
Sometimes no women for long periods of time
He is very much in control of completely switching off
If I ever said I just want a hug or a phone call or some respect
He would say "Dont tell me how I should think or behave"
I feel he is a mean spirited person and hurt a lot of people and doesnt know as he is an alcoholic
He doesnt know the alcoholic person
He only knows the sweet sober guy who goes to work.
I must let this go !!!!!!!
Its difficult to know if a guy is an alcoholic they can hide it.
I will try but you fall for them before its too late
We must keep our radars on and keep reinforcing our boundaries so we can say no more!
Ive ordered the book co dependant no more from the library
If I went to meetings I would just break down right now
Im so upset
Love and light to you all may we have peace and happiness!
