my Xhusband died in his sleep at age 54 of alcohol related cardiac issues....but he was found by his mother as he had moved in with her. he died in 2009 and had not worked since 2001....he left a huge mess for our daughter, his only child. IRS lien on one of the houses, she told me he had not filed taxes since we divorced in 1987! again with the filth in both of the houses he owned and an underground oil tank, neglected everything. When she was cleaning his one house to sell she found over $20K in uncashed checks from stock dividends, which paid off a lot of the tax issues. it was a huge convoluted mess she had to deal with at age 29.
I only mention this so you are sure not to overlook what might help pay the bills. I am so very sorry for your loss and what you had to see. Good that you have a place to vent, which is what SR is for also, support. I have been here 5 years and it is a daily place for me in several areas. I have as true friends here as I do FTF.
Please continue to post and participate.