Erin...I am so sorry for your loss and all the things you have gone through and are going through now. I hate alcohol...it shatters lives and families...and leaves the leftovers just as you described it.
You are not alone...I once wondered about the support here too...and it took me a long time to post...and then I retreated and then posted again...it turned out to be much of my fear...the fear of rejection and abandonment from deep inside...a lifetime of alcoholics.
I hope you keep coming back and posting...post it all...it is ok...everyone needs to be able to get it out.
You are not alone.