terpgal....I suspect that your unhappiness with the housework...to the degree that it is...is really a reflection of a bigger issue in the relationship...which is a feeling of inequity in general.
As far as the cleaning, itself, goes...If I were in your shoes, I would hire someone to come in and clean. If he doesn't like that...well, he can stay mad until he gets glad.
These are my thoughts on the situation....
dandylion
***I have never lived with a man, myself, who was eager to do housework. They couldn't have cared less. It was...do it myself...or compromise a solution....