I didn't expect to "feel better" sober. I know some folks do. I quit for reasons that even I don't fully understand, but my life was more fun drinking, I had more of a sense of connection with others, I liked my friend circle more than this AA one, I had more hope and excitement about the future...
Still, it is actually how much I don't like being sober that lets me know it is probably exactly what I am supposed to be doing at this time in my life. I also had severe childhood trauma; I've dealt with some of it simply through time, some therapy and reading, and then there are bits that might never go away. But I do believe in my capacity to grow through whatever is blocking my way right now. I believe I am growing and when I was drinking I felt that I was not changing internally, just dancing by myself in a hall of mirrors.
So, the good thing is that I wasn't expecting to enjoy it. And yes, there are folks who talk often about how much better they feel. I hear it in meetings alot, usually from people who you couldn't pay me a million dollars to live their life for even a week. OK, maybe for a million dollars, but you get my point. They are happy with a life that I would find unacceptable, so that just goes to show you that the quality of life and our ability to feel happiness are not necessarily linked.
I feel that the quality of my life has improved in sobriety, but it is not in areas which make me "happier." I was "happier" drinking. Whatever. This story is not ALL about my happiness - there are other important elements.
It sounds like you are convincing yourself that it hasn't been worth it. Maybe not. Only you know. But I would suggest that sobriety may be "worth it" whether or not it makes us happy, or dampens the cries of our wounded child.
I'm working on not having as many expectations (of anything or anyone) and thus not wrestling with disappointment all the time...