Red flashing lights. *danger* *danger*
free, this man is still sick, and still very dangerous to you. Every time you see him, you will be assessing how he "seems." And we KNOW how he can "seem"--he seemed "better" after rehab, too. And now he seems "better" after jail and a few meetings. He is FAR from being "better" in the sense that you can be safe with him. It just doesn't happen that fast.
It took me, and most sober alcoholics I know, close to a year before my thinking was pretty well straightened out. He's got all this abuse/mental health stuff going on, as well.
The thing about seeing him during this process is that he can put on a good "face" for you for brief periods. He's hopeful he can convince you to let him come home. He isn't on his own, where the real test happens--how well are you living when nobody's watching? How committed are you, really, to sobriety? Because as long as he's got this goal of coming home, he figures he can "relax" once he gets there.
Just because he didn't interrogate you during dinner, when he's on his best behavior (and it didn't go over well last time he did it), doesn't mean he's stopped thinking that way, that he's not checking up on you in less obvious ways.
I think meeting him for dinner dates is a bad, bad idea. As always, it's your choice, but I think it is putting you in a vulnerable place.