I have been shot too for no reason except I was where I was when it happened. It worried me for a bit. Your injury sounds much more serious than mine and I am sure that adds to the complications of getting to a better place in your mind.
I know I went thru many things in getting over the shock. It just seems like I should have sensed something but, I just walked right into it. I started looking at what I was doing to myself over this and realized it could have been much worse. The main thing is that I lived and to me that means that I have living to do and I can either go along with it or be dragged....