Sad, sad, sad...
My mom is dying, stage 4 cancer, she's elderly, and had a good life until recently, when she and my dad "rescued" my 47 yr old sister from long-term re-hab and thought they had the stuff to "cure" her. That was 2 1/2 years ago. AS has been in and out of the hospital, all alcohol related illnesses. When my Mom was diagnosed with cancer, my Dad had asked for my help in getting AS into inpatient re-hab, and OMG, I moved heaven and earth locating services and agencies from long-distance as they live 100 miles away in the woods. My Dad's health is declining rapidly as he not only takes care of my Mom, but has become hyper-vigilant about AS who lives in their basement apartment, drinking and smoking IN THE HOUSE!!!!! I find that I can deal better with AS than my Mom's codie behavior. Needless to say, all the work I did to get my sister help was undermined by Mom's co-dependency and my Dad's unwillingness to upset my Mom. Now, my Mom is really sick, unable to care for herself, and it was the plan that I come up and care for her as I am semi-retired and more flexible than my other sibs. I went no contact with AS and limited with parents shortly after being told that AS was only going to go to out-patient because, oh, what does it matter. Mom wants me to come up there, now, and I am already in panic mode. I WANT to be there, but how do I keep my boundries in that situation? Man, I can't bring my therapist with me! So I will become even MORE aware of my OWN codie behavior, I swear I am codie to a codie!