god ajarlson that's horrible, i'm so sorry. and amazed that you had any patience for her in recent years. you didn't deserve the tiniest bit of that! i can't believe how many messages she gave you, just in that short paragraph, that you were less important and worthy than you absolutely are. that's the opposite of what a mother should do. emotional abuse is so complicated. i would love to hear, some time, the evolution of your understanding of what she did to you (because although the drinking didn't start until recently in my mom's story, the emotional lampooning was a lifelong art). i'm only just embarking on my own.