Originally Posted by
doggonecarl 
...and you feel you can do something about Adam?
This statement is a little harsh, but true. Are you code-ing out on another Codie?
I think giving Adam some resources if/when he asks is great, but then I'd drop it. If he pursues it, asks follow up questions..... great. There are phenomenal resources available here at SR, as a starting point. I'd begin with the sticky threads up top.
I'd point out to Adam that HIS epiphany about the value of his life isn't going to be relatable to Paul. Paul will never see what Adam is talking about so long as he is actively drinking.... and is that REALLY how Adam wants to spend every precious day of this life that he has this new appreciation for?
I also witnessed was Paul reminding Adam that when he was on his own, he drank heavier.
Quack! Quack, quack, quack!
The sun was brighter today, I had to drink more. Traffic was awful, my boss is an idiot, the sun set too early, life isn't fair...... I HAD to drink more. An active alcoholic is never, ever short on reasons to justify their drinking. Poor me, poor me, pour me another drink!
If Adam tosses Paul out & Paul CHOOSES to drink all the heavier, then he's a grown man making a bad decision. End of story. He has the choice AND the right to drink if he desires, it's not for Adam to manage. No God appointed him to be Paul's personal savior. (But we Codies are good at convincing ourselves that we HAVE to play these roles.)
I think reading the "Let Me Fall" thread might be helpful for Adam as well. (can't remember if it's a sticky)
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-me-fall.html
Best of luck, all around!