Hey TG,
Awareness is a huge step, and you've just become aware of a lot of things. Be easy on yourself, and just keep being aware. For what it's worth, I agree that you don't need to share your plans with him. And, I don't think it's unreasonable to expect courteous and thoughtful behavior from your spouse even though you may not have communicated your exact needs at the time. Apparently, it is unreasonable to expect it from him though. Please don't accept the blame for his unacceptable behavior regarding the dog.
Hugs,
Fathom