Your ah is a sick man. That date and your ah are like apples and oranges. Not the same. They are not going to have the same motivations.
To be far, your husband, his family, your old friends, at least one judge and a lawyer or two have suggested you move back to the US for the last couple of years. You have written much about it and many of us here thought that might be a good idea for the short term at least. You and 2 of your kids didn't want to move back.
BTW, not everyone should have children. Neither of my parents should have had them. I imagine there are nice things about having kids, but not everyone is equipped to guide, care for and teach them.