Thank you Feeling...I appreciate your kind words. I talked the talk last time, but I didn't walk the walk. In looking back, the people pleaser in me was saying the things that sounded good and by passing the hard work. I want the outcome to be different this time. If I want the outcome to be different I have to change everything I'm doing. One of the hardest things for me to do is share my feelings...but my HP keep leading me to this site. This is the most anonymous places of all to share. So I begin to change my habit of not sharing and being the perfect 'addict'....I hope what I am saying makes sense. Thank you for listening.