Panicking -advice?
Wow I know I've posted a few new threads lately il stop flooding this board soon I'm sorry but im struggling and don't know where else to turn
I'm absolurely exhausted haven't slept much this week, and now I'm so so so mad at the person I've been seeing for almost 5 years. It's a totally complicated, in many ways unhealthy relationship that I often think I want out of for my own sanity (I love him very much but that's not really enough is it..) anyway he's being incredibly hurtful right now and yet positioning himself as the victim
Blah blah blah not here for relationship advice
Point is, we're probably nearing the end of this relationship it seems and I'm so angry with everyone/everything anyway (I think I'm just super irritable -early sobriety and exhaustion etc) and now to be furious at him and possibly go through a break up at 19 days sober...
Well, how the hell do I not drink through that?!!!
I'm 24, 5 years is a really long time to be with someone for me and I've never even broken up with anyone I've really cared about before. I don't know how to deal with that without alcohol
The only thing making me reach out here instead of finding something to drink right now is 1. It's after midnight here and I don't drive and 2. More importantly il very likely lose the place I'm living and my 2 remaining family members that still speak to me if I drink again
Even knowing this I have a sort-of plan to buy something to drink in the morning then go to the casino (where guys always buy me drinks and I've had very stupid sexual encounters when feeling needy/trying to validate myself)
Help? Any advice? Ass kicking? Understanding? Anything?