mindflight - he's sent a pretty clear message. He doesn't want help. Trying to micromanage him getting help isn't going to change that. I just got out of a relationship with a man who sounds very similar. I ended it after 6 months (and some very similar conversations, followed by him attending ONE AA meeting and getting sober for about 30 days...he then got drunk, belligerent and called me a stupid bitch, which was finally my breaking point). Ending it was scary, I was worried for my personal safety at times. In the end, though, getting out has been the best thing ever. My life is so much better and so much happier now.