Originally Posted by
retroactive 
Alcohol has totally ruined every relationship I have formed. Last night I lost control of how much I was drinking and I blacked out. I have been too ashamed to talk to anyone because I know what a fool I made of myself last night. I have been holed up in my room alone with the worst anxiety ever.
Originally Posted by
retroactive I want to say that I'll stay sober, but it'd be a lie. I know that I am going to try drinking moderately this weekend.
These two statements are how you have ended up where you are currently at. Moderation does not work for people who have come to the realization that they need help with their addictions, and I am willing to bet that every addict on here will agree with that statement.
I had too many nights like you just described, I lost relationships, made poor choices, got in legal trouble, blacked out, etc...is any of that really worth drinking for? Why? Get over the social pressure of drinking and make a choice to better your life and health.
Reading the above statement is cause for concern, reading the second statement is cause for intervention. Think about it, what are you really going to gain by drinking in moderation this weekend? You know as well as I that "moderation" will go out the window as soon as you start, and as soon as the social pressure is on. You will wake up in the same situation that you found yourself in this morning; hungover, wondering what the hell happened last night, and filled with regret. Is it really worth all of that anxiety and grief? I don't think so...
Your call, but I would hope that you would reconsider your decision to drink "moderately" which we all know is not possible for an addict.