Hi, thank you for the hope. I have been down this road and a few rehabs. Wish one had been in London. I would have stayed there. Someone told me once that all the drinking does not bring back people that I have loss. That goes for dogs also. I am feeling so angry at myself for wasting so many years of my life. I have a hard time w AA here in this cowtown I live in. I have not connected w hardly anyone here in the program. I am a serial relasper and feel like I need a new town w new faces in AA. Omg you have no clue. This is not London, New York or New Orleans. I know that sounds like a big excuse. I have been trying AA here for years. It is what it is and not many to choose from. The only game in town. Wich really sucks. I am not bashing AA. Because I need the support and will go. I also know there is other choices out there. I can not do this alone so I have to go to AA. I am venting here because I need to. I can not tell people in AA how I truly feel. They would shoot me down in a minute. So here I am writing and venting to get through another night without Crown Royal. Thank you for being there.