I also think talking to your kids is a GREAT idea.
My mom has had some sleepless nights over this issue since starting recovery herself a couple of years ago. She apologized to me one day & could barely get the words out because of the shame & all those negative emotions.
I told her, "Just because I have damage doesn't mean I hold resentments, Mom."
Even if I didn't understand at the time, I certainly did now, years later & I could clearly see that she did the best she knew to do, that her actions came from love & not some malicious intent. Your kids will see that Butterfly. ((((hugs)))