Listen to your Spidey sense, my friend. My AH has done some pretty screwy shite over the last 2 years that we've been together, & my Spidey sense about what's really going on has never failed me.
It sucks beyond suckage, I know. But as Zoso says, better just a broken heart than a broken heart, continual mind-fuckage & possibly a broken bank account & other broken relationships bc of her...
Hugs.