Hi December friends. I am struggling, what else is new? I am handling this all wrong, I know it and I can't go on like this. But there's always a reason, always an excuse, isn't there?
I truly love each and every one of you and the ways you have shared your stories, been so honest, supported me and each other. This is a family I don't want to lose.
I joined this group December 1st with a commitment to remain sober. I wanted it. But unexpected things happened and I used them as an excuse, for the better part of the last 2 months, to use alcohol as a crutch. I failed, over and over. My best, strongest, most positive days were when I didn't drink. It's so obvious. So I'm not giving up. I know that the best thing for myself, my life, and my family is to end this tie I have to alcohol.
Tomorrow is a new day and a new commitment. I will be in bed soon. Tomorrow my dad, mom, stepmom, brother, and my two daughters will attend church led by a man who has been trying to help my dad. I am not very religious, but try to find spiritual connections everywhere .
I want to handle all of this Better, I know I can and I will.
I promise I will be a better supporter and friend to all of you. There is just so little of me left right now. I read all of your post and my heart and thoughts are with each of you. You are amazing
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