Originally Posted by
atalose 
I know for me in the past when I had become consumed with confusion, confusion equaled me not accepting reality and remaining in that hoping, wishing, what if state of denial because the reality was not something I was ready to fully handle.
Now is the time to fully focus on the resources you will need in order to get out and begin working on that plan. Summer is a long way off many more months of hurt and pain for you to deal with, not good.
If the resources needed are money I'd be thinking of family and friends who may be able to afford you a loan.
Thanks.
Yes, the resources needed are: 1.) working car 2.) job 3.) enough money to get a place and start on my own.
Which is why summer is my goal.... for now I'm sorta stuck out here in the country in a small town. No family or friends nearby.
My family doesn't loan money, they are aware of the problems, but they don't loan or give money to help even though my brothers are both pretty well off. They just mostly judge me.
It just stinks wanting to leave, I'd even say needing to leave (as most days I start to have a panic attack when he comes home,) and not be able to right now.