Originally Posted by
Tiredwife88 
I sent his therapist a text letting him know in a nutshell what happened last night. He agreed to see him tonight after normal hours
I know I'm not supposed to do that...that it should have been H making the call on his own. But I did it, and he is going.
He tried to talk this morning, saying could we "be friends". I was still angry so I said no, that he crossed acceptable lines and I couldn't deal with it.
I spoke with my therapist from his rehabnthis morning, she is great. Gave me good support on taking care of myself.
Your safety is an important issue, and in that case, it is good you called his therapist. If he did not appear to be such a danger then yes, he could make the phone call himself, but you did it more for you and your daughter than for him - so don't beat yourself up about it! You did good.
I also called a therapist for XABF, when I finally realized just how abusive he was treating me.
In truth, the therapist was a therapist for the company where we both worked, so I went there for me (1) with the hope that he'd reinforce to me that I wasn't crazy, and (2) because he had authority from the company to do things like "force" people into rehab if they wanted to stay employed, and so I was hopeful he'd force XABF into rehab.
As a result of that visit, XABF was forced into rehab, and I was able to change the locks on my apartment and escape from his abuse. XABF also happened to get sober as a result, so it was a nice bonus for him, but I did it so that I could be free from his abuse.
In short, you did what you needed to do! I am hoping that as he works through his sobriety, he finds healthy non-abusive ways of coping with things. That said, please be prepared, alcohol doesn't
cause someone to be abusive, and so many people still are even after they quit drinking. In my example above, even sober, XABF tried to stalk me and even enlisted his family to help track me down. (There were calls to my work phone and my BOSS to try and get him to divulge my cell phone number, since I had changed it. Funny enough, they knew my favorite Al-Anon meeting but never tried looking for me there. Hmm...) It didn't end until after he died (cancer).
I am hopeful that your situation does not go this route.
I do recommend that you build a support network just in case. Your therapist sounds like a great start!
Regardless of how everything works out, even if he does work through this and turn into the perfect husband and father afterwards, it's a tough road.
Good friends (and professionals) are always a blessing.