does he have a sponsor or therapist you could call about the rage/hitting his self? Not sure if it is your place to do so, but that seems pretty scary to me, and in need of being addressed somehow.
perhaps you have a crisis center, who you could call, and who might come visit if he acts like that again? sounds like he needs some help, for sure, and you and your daughter should not have to be exposed to that.
wishing you the best
