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After living with an addict for 7 years, I think that the addiction makes them sociopaths. That statement "HIT" me. My xABF was getting crazier and crazier towards the end. My dad was a schizophrenic. Living with my xABF the last 1.5 years before the relationship ended in him moving out after many manic episodes.

I think the alcohol seriously rots the brain. That sounds like a 'duh' statement. But seriously he is so paranoid and delusional that it was getting scary. I had friends who thought he might wake up in the middle of the night and hurt me and my DS5.

Sorry to go off on a tangent. I am not sure that it is an intentional 'not caring' on the part of the alcoholic/addict. IMO it is not directed at the sig other in the relationship. Why do I think this? I think this because after observation I have realized that my xABF didn't even care about himself enough to want to do the responsible things most people do. He is content to let his mom pay his rent (and so am I). I know he loves his son (some say not enough but who I am to judge) but he doesn't financially support him either. I do and always have. But I think that he doesn't even financially support himself so how can he support our son. This doesn't make it right. I understand that. My point, I guess, is that the addict is broken. Their ability to see things the way others do is pointing to a completely different delusion of reality that we most see. We are all delusional in that we all live different realities and come from different perspectives. In the addicts reality, there is one 'most' important thing that comes before everything. Even themselves. It is sad. I grieve for my xABF silently. I sincerely hope that someday he will snap out of it. That is what kept me around so long. But people are who people are. We have to believe in what is tangible and what fits our own realities and perspectives. Just pray that he will have the capacity to love some day.