welcome Usetosmile.
Glad you are here.
You will find amazing support, and I am so glad you have chosen to vent and share what you are currently living.
Just want to add, I believe the open lines of communication with your kids is truly the first step, some wise SR member posted, It's the continued lies that keep us all sick that with a whole bunch of other wisdom has stuck in my head.
Hope to be hearing more from You.
Peace, my new friend.