I think calling is a good idea. However:
I feel responsible being shoulder to shoulder with this for so many years and not seeing what it was doing.
Don't. I mean, I'm not telling you what to FEEL -- I'm telling you (and you know this already so it's just a reminder) that addicts are really good at covering their tracks and lying. I mean, if I could live under the same roof with a guy for about a year without realizing he was an alcoholic... how on earth were you supposed to know what was going on with your AF???
Do the right thing, but don't blame yourself for not being a psychic. (((hugs)))