Guilt/shame/balance/sleep?
As per my other post it has been a really rough couple of days. I went to a meeting last night and I went to a meeting the night before. Continuously reaching out and talking to people in recovery over the last few days.
Today - I'm just feeling emotionally/mentally/physically exhausted beyond belief.
I just want to shut my brain off in the only healthy way I know how, and sleep tonight. Curl up in bed with my doggy, rest, recharge, take care of me.
But part of my brain is saying "no - don't miss a meeting - you need to force yourself to stay awake and go". And this part of me is feeling a lot of guilt about just wanting to take a night off.
Is this an unreasonable thing to do? I need to get an answer from somebody else because my brain is too crazy to be coherent right now.
I feel like I live in constant guilt/fear of "not doing it right" and find it impossible to find balance with anything anymore.