Welcome trust me I have been where you are at right down to the vanilla extract. Life is so much easier sober. It's getting through the first few days. This is where a Dr can be of great service. After the initial withdrawals you have to take the steps to keep yourself well. It's not easy but is definitely doable. I am fairly new to staying quit(I am a pro at quitting) so I don't pretend to have any pearls off wisdom all I can offer is everything including the bad stuff is so much easier to manage sober.