Unmanageable
An excerpt from the NarAnon Family book, Sharing Experience, Strength and Hope, January 8:
"I wondered how the addict could not make better choices because they surely could see the consequences. Then I thought of my own life and I realized that I tended to do the same thing. I tried to ignore the fact that if I stepped in and started getting involved, then I would likely get hurt. No, I only saw that my actions would make someone else's life better. Who am I to say what is going to be the answer for someone else? How can I say their life would be better because I saw it that way? Did I learn my lessons by someone telling me, or do I learn my lessons by going through them myself? If I tried to get involved in someone else's program or inventory, my life became insane and unmanageable."
Last night I started on January 1 of this book and read up to the 8th, finding at the exact same day of the calendar a very important reminder for me RIGHT NOW, the paragraph above. I needed to be reminded of this!
My RAD is not really speaking or interacting with me, but she is making progress on getting resources set up for the near future--WIC, food stamps, insurance, housing, Mother-Baby support classes. I don't get details, and I don't ask; I just say, "that's great, honey." It is hard to not ask more, offer to help, want to be involved, but I know I must keep my distance and let her become the adult she really, really has to be now.