I came here to help support my sobriety.
I was beaten and had failed many times.
In the stories of relapses and in the steady stream of newcomers I found solidarity and understanding.
In the longer-timers I found inspiration.
I am now over a year sober but I have learned from my past and the stories of others that those sober days offer me no protection. Every new day could be a new relapse if I choose it.
So I come here now because it helps me keeps head in that reality. The relapses and the newcomers' stories help keep it fresh in my mind just how easily I could hit the reset and be back in the darkness. The words of suffering and despair help me remember that not so log ago; that was me.
And now I also come here to try and offer inspiration of my own where I can. I have over a year and while that is no guarantee - it is a gift and the longest I've been sober since I began drinking at 14. So I am here to pay it forward.
This is a community. Like AA, this community is key to my sobriety and I feel a sense of commitment to offer back what I am able - even as I continue to take what I need.
Sometimes, it IS depressing..... Yet even that is a gift. Without it, I don't think I would remember.... And I'd be right back in the dark.