Joe Nerv

I disagree. I think it would be more accurate to say MOST people need more than the 12 steps to really get healthy . Problem is some people believe the 12 steps are the be all and end all to everything in life.

The 12 steps to me were a path that opened lots of other doors that allowed me to change and grow. They led me to therapy, CBT, exercise, a change of diet, a change of interests, new friends, spiritual paths I'd have otherwise probably never been opened up to. It wasn't about memorizing 164 pages for me, it was about using what was introduced in those pages and incorporating it into MY life, and my experience. And then sharing that experience strength and hope as best I could. The steps also helped me stay the course.

Does this mean I work them perfectly? We all know the answer to that. What I've found though is that over time, through my going to lots and lots and lots of step and bigbook meetings, they've become a part of who I am. My homegroup has always been either a step or BB meeting (and never a preachy type BB meeting, there are some good ones). It's impossible for me to leave those meetings without thoughts and ideas on the steps lingering, while inspiring and pushing me towards a better, healthier way of life. It's very much like brainwashing to me, but it's voluntary, and it's washing a brain that very much needs to be washed.

FWIW, when I was newly sober I read a non AA step book that said if we're truly working a 3rd step, we'll notice that we stop doing things that are harmful to ourselves and others, and start doing healthy things. Our HP after all wouldn't want us destroying ourselves anymore, nor those around us. That made total sense to me. Yet at 2 yrs sober I smoked 3 packs of cigarettes a day, and it was impossible to stop. 4 years, and 100 attempts later I was no closer to quitting. At 5 years sober though I was healing in a lot of ways, certain defects of character seemed to be getting worse. In a few areas I was acting in ways that would easily have people thinking I was full of crap regarding any kind of "spiritual" experience or healing. But I stayed the course and trusted. I kept turning my life and will over, taking my inventory, begging that my defects be removed, and doing service. What I can only see now in retrospect is that the healing I hoped would come, did, in just about all those areas. In the middle of my 5th year I was able to put cigarettes down. Without a whole lot of trouble I might add. My other distasteful activities brought me pain that had me reach out, and I got additional help I needed with that (a new sponsor, different 12 step groups, a bunch of seminars [anyone remember Bradwhaw?], etc). 10 years into sobriety, I was TRULY a different person than the guy that originally walked in the doors of AA.

While I didn't grow in leaps and bounds after that I had a few earth shaking experiences that definitely chipped away at areas that needed remolding.

At 30 years sober I'm still far from being the perfect person I'd like to be, but I'm much further away from the person I used to be. I am hyper aware of what still needs work. Interestingly, this forum tends to bring the worst out in me at times , but I'm actually grateful for that. It helps me see areas that still need lots of work.

Bla, bla, bla.... the 12 steps are a path I'll forever be grateful for being placed upon. If I were to put all this into one sentence I'd simplify by quoting what pagekeeper said. The best I can do is just be as honest and willing as I can be at any given moment. I'd add the open minded part too.