Ugh! I'm frustrated with myself for getting angry at him for doing something that I told him he should be doing all along!! What a miserable wretch I am!
I am mad when he isn't doing it, and then I am mad when he is. Good riddance to bad rubbish...I mean seriously...I AM ridiculous.
I think I need to pray for some grace here. I seem to be really lacking in that department. I am also hormonal and blah blah the list goes on.
Thank you all. I know he is doing his best. I should respect that.
The flip side ( because there ALWAYS is a flip side for me) is that he has made these "rules" while he is away ( like --don't tell sister, don't hang out with long lost friend, don't tell so and so...etc) that isolate me. It pisses me off that he is making friends, talking to people, and using the resources that are in front of him while he has virtually made it impossible for me to seek fellowship with others. I just keep hearing his verbal berating " your a this, your a that".....I think that is moreover MY problem however, and not his...I am the one letting that abusive BS rule my life.
Well enough of it for tonight. I am going to try to get some rest. Kids have me watching "teen wolf"......teenage drama is enough to bring MASSIVE tears to my eyes due to it's stupidity.
