I appreciate the help.
No Marie, I'm not young... unfortunately. Not old either. 35. I just wanted to be able to vent about what goes on in my life lately. And perhaps I must sound like a f***ing idiot. Ive had NO ONE to talk to bc i only moved here a year ago from the Midwest. I dont chat with my girlfriends about this bc, I guess the physical distance between us has created emotional distance as well. So I dont talk about this with them. I bounce stuff off a couple of coworkers. Im getting closer with them. They know a brief version of my issues. I just wanted people to hear me and I just wanted to feel like I'm not alone.
Anvil: He's a good person but he's messed up. And yeah it gets gross. I get it.
Yes Rosales. That analogy is a really good one. Like I said, I dont have friends here so, ive created too small a world. So I've relied on solely him as my company. Not good. Im hanging more with my coworkers lately though. So that's a start!
I appreciate the perspectives, they help me. Just could some of you keep it in mind that this isnt easy. I wish I could just walk away 100% forever. But it's taking some time for me to get there. It's as if I should just know, and now. So please ease up with the "Do it. What's the problem? NEXT!" Jesus christ.
On a positive note, I'm going to wrap gifts and watch cartoons. Yes, some 35 year old women watch cartoons.