I learned a hell of a lot when I finally sat down and DID step one.
I was fortunate to have a sponsor, but for step 1 all he really DID was give me a workbook and tell me to come let him know when I'd completed it and we'd go through it.
Here is a link to some online Step 1 worksheets. There are many out there. I suggest you just roll up your sleeves and DO STEP ONE.
Step one is about taking an honest look at our lives now, in the past, our behaviors and experiences with alcohol and addiction, and coming to really, truly understand we are powerless and living an unmanageable life.
It's one thing to say it at a meeting.... it's very much another to take the time and the action to honestly look at our lives, write the stuff down and start talking about our own specific story - to ourselves and another.
Because you're having a tough time right now with your sponsor and it sounds like, others in your group -why not set all of that aside. Step One can be done by just DOING IT.
Take a look at the below link, google "Step One Workbook" and seek out others. Take the time to print them out and start writing. Then, in a couple of weeks go to AA and say "I have been working hard on Step One. I have really learned some things and I would like someone with at least a year of sobriety who has done the steps to share with and to help me prepare for Step 2."
I bet you'd find progress.....
I'm sorry that you're frustrated and struggling - here is one way you might proceed without feeling a victim or feeling helpless to move forward.
various step 1 worksheets and questions for recovery 12 step work