Originally Posted by matilda123

Boy, I can relate to this one, Serenidad. I have the exact same reaction. Was a cutter too as a child, so I used to literally hurt myself when I was angry (and of course, with alcohol, I was doing the same). One strategy that has worked for me is to let myself feel the feeling. I used to sort of stave it off because I hate conflict too, but then it would bubble inside of me. I try to let it wash over me like a wave and, if it seems productive, try to figure out what it is I'm reacting to. For example,when I'm angry it is often because I feel hurt or disrespected. If the relationship seems worth it, I will tell the person calmly what I feel and what I need. That has been a huge and scary step for me, but an empowering one. If the relationship isn't worth it (someone I don't know well is rude), I acknowledge what I feel and move on. I also refuse to let people I dislike compromise my sobriety. Why give them that power? That is what I tell myself. A little mind game, but it helps. Congratulations on 10 days, Serenaded: you're doing great. Don't let those turkeys get you down.