Finally Had A Checkup
Ok, so i finally got around to doing something i thought i'd take care of quick.
First off, decent checkups in the NYC area are ridiculously expensive if you don't have insurance. Had to have someone hook me up with a doctor so i settled for whatever. As it turns out i waited for hours to be called but the exam was pretty thorough considering the basics of the place. the people there actually cared about their patients rather than treating you as just another number as you would be in the community health centers.
The reactions to the dates of my last medical care were something to see, apparently they're not used to patients who don't even bother to visit emergency rooms for various physical injuries that would can leave one with virtually permanent infirmities. As i told them, i'm working class. Medical care is for those with money and people on welfare. You're a single male of working age you got nothing coming so you learn to suffer in silence. Physically, i'm a wreck and they found out but it was a relief to finally confess to someone about the mental issues. We discussed a whole lot of things and they regretted on how i slipped through the cracks in the system years ago when certain serious issues could have been dealt with before they grew toxic.
When everything was said. summed up, and the various tests and checks they needed to run on me planned, i knew before they even told me that i would have to be signing on as a charity case with the state. I hate it all to hell but we all know there is no possible way i can afford the battery of tests that are needed. You know how at work there are "occupational hazards"? What i do for a living is basically slowly killing me. I know it too. You go work with pretty harsh chemicals with minimal, if any, safety gear and you bite the bullet. A man has to do what a man has to do. To put it bluntly, don't plan for retirement as you aren't going to last that long. It does help being of a suicidal mindset cause i would deal with chemicals in ways that left co-workers and management in awe at how i'd contaminate myself and keep right on going and never miss a shift.. Thankfully i'm in between contracts and so can finally sort things out in a way that if all works out, i'll never have to go back to that kind of job again.
Hopefully things go right when i go deal with the paperwork.