Short answer: yes this is typical alcoholic behavior.
Slight longer answer: you can spend the rest of your life trying to figure out why A's do what they do but even if you could somehow untangle that knot, would it change anything? Would it make his behavior any more or less acceptable to understand why he does it?
When we block out what active A's SAY and only pay attention to what they DO, it is a lot easier to accept them at face value and make choices accordingly.
I'm sorry it doesn't make it hurt any less, but only time and space are going to help with that anyway. Sending you hugs, strength, and patience.