From the child's point of view, I'd agree that it's domestic abuse. I lived it and could never imagine putting my own children through it.
I'm sorry he's doing this, but I understand it well. My AM always loaded us down with expensive gifts that we didn't want (well, I didnt. My sister is AM's mini-me.), but we never got genuine love or affection. Even my father in his own dysfunction takes the stance of "if you can't love em, buy em off."