I pretty much agree with Amy. You sound perfectly lucid and articulate and I would be pretty certain that you are reading the situation well. Lots of people have all sorts of relationship issues, commitment issues, and all sorts of issues about all sorts of things, whether recovering alcoholics or not. Its a real pity that he has not been able to explain this to you in an adult mature way that allows you to understand what is going on and this has therefore led to huge uncertainties and put you in a position that you felt and still feel is unworkable. From what you have said it seems pretty clear that the relationship is not working for you. Maybe he is messing with your head with all this push/pull stuff and maybe he is just immature and maybe its something else. To be honest you have just put your toe back into the water so to speak and I don't think you should beat yourself up too much about it. Move on, enjoy your life and the amazing progress that you have made. the right guy is probably just around the corner.