Originally Posted by
redatlanta 
I have read your back story. I suggest that you need to attend Al Anon if you have not been and work the step program. The cruise is not until March and it would be good for you to get some guidance in how to handle this situation.
I read a couple of threads indicating that DV has been an issue in your marriage which escalates when your husband drinks. You also have indicated that your family is at zero tolerance with your husband. We cannot control someone else we can only control ourselves. I hope you will start with Al Anon and focus on yourself and what you need rather than focus on AH, his needs, and what you think you need to do to accommodate his desires while sacrificing your own.
Congrats on staying sober - a terrific accomplishment! I know this is a very hard situation - lots of ((((hugs)))) and we are here for you.
Thanks for the post. I will try and break it down simple.
I told my husband that I do not want to be in a relationship with an active alcoholic. So there has been no more drinking in the past few weeks. If he does go back to that lifestyle, I won't want to be around it. Is he resentful about this? Probably, but he is doing a good job of still finding a way in his life to be happy, so all is good.
I think he would become very resentful if he cannot drink on the cruise. It would be a different resentment than the one now. I cannot change this, he has already made up his mind to drink. And I am choosing to still go. I can put up with his drinking for a week on the vacation, but I will not put up with it if he comes back and starts drinking again. The choice is his.