Originally Posted by
Nonsensical 
Wow. I'm not THAT bad. Maybe I'm not an alcoholic.
JOKING!
It's impressive that you wrote all that down. I think only a person who is ready to move on would be so motivated. I can smell what you're cooking, and I LIKE it.
Thanks Nonsensical! I can't stand to live another day in the black hole that I have put myself back in. This time it is more about the severe unhappiness, hopelessness, depression, anxiety, and sometimes suicidal thoughts. I would never kill myself....but the fact that I have thought about it a few times when I was drinking speaks volumes as to how miserable I have become since I relapsed.
I have 2 choices. 1. I can keep drinking and die and slow miserable death.
2. I can get sober and climb back out of this black hole and be happy like I was when I was sober!
I know a few people (friends and people) who have died from alcoholism and it was truly the saddest, most torturous thing I have ever watched in my entire life!
I don't want that for myself!
Thanks for the continued support!
