Way to go!!! that is definitely a step in the right direction!!!
I know how scary you're feeling right now. You are NOT pathetic...don't beat yourself up!! The AA and NA programs have saved my life...i found a home away from home. They will welcome you with open arms and yes people do go while under the influence, it's suggested that if you are that you just listen. Also i would suggest that you go over to the NA forum here you will find a lot of support there as well, really anywhere on the poard here is full of caring supportive people. There are also online meetings here, maybe you want to check that out. I still recommend face to face meetings though and i really hope you go!!! \\//peace