Biff123

2 years ago today I decided that enough was enough. The previous day I started drinking early, and was at it all day. Later in the day I started mixing Percocet. At night before bed, I was quite worried that I was so intoxicated that I would OD overnight. Today, I never have to worry about that. I also don't have to worry about not being able to take my kids to their sports practice or God forbid, to the ER because Im too drunk to drive. I don't have to worry about not looking my boss in the eye in the morning because of the fear of being outed by my bloodshot eyes with black bags underneath. I don't have to worry about going to the doctor and him telling me that my liver enzymes are off the charts. I don't have to worry about dying a premature death and leaving my wife and children alone because of something I could have controlled. I don't have to worry about dealing with the crushing anxiety of a hangover today, nor do I plan on ever having to deal with it again.

I thank God for helping me to become sober and be the man I am today. When I was drinking I was quick to anger and would lash out at my kids quite regularly. While they still drive me nuts from time to time, I am able to take a deep breath, and rarely raise my voice. At 32, I am finally learning what it means to be an adult. Although I have accomplished many things in my life so far, I am finally becoming and adult emotionally. I am growing up.

While I don't participate in AA, I do fully believe in keeping it simple an just not drinking today. The two years definitely had its ups and downs, but I can say without a shadow of a doubt, it was worth every minute of pain and craving and being uncomfortable.

Thanks to everyone here who posts on the regular. SR is my lifeline and my only means of a recovery program.

To those who are suffering today in the grips of alcoholism, please don't up. You can be free from this terrible disease. Just make it through today. Soon you'll wake up and it will be 2 years since your last drink.

~Biff