I'm so scared it gets really tough emotionally speaking when finances aren't great, work environment isn't great, court coming up.. Always arguing with my family because I work with them .. No friends now really only three left.. Now no church because that's where the friends were.. Moving home because I can't afford the rent.. Well this has to be my rock bottom.. Now the only other thing that could make this feeling worse is death of a loved one or getting cancer/disease then I've really seen it all... and have experienced it all.. I fear those things too.. I hope they don't happen.. Oh great someone just hit my car whilst it was parked and drove off ... I hate my life... I hate myself.. I hate all of this. I want to die.. I wish I didn't have a son to take care of... Then I could just runaway and not have these problems .. It's all too much universe.. It's all too much .. Years and years of suffering when will it end.