*HUG*
If you feel like crying..... then cry
You will have the strength... trust that, I personally believe that God gives it to me... I pray alot, I go to service, I talk with friends, and I post on boards and read other peoples stories.... That is how I have gotten through it. I have had years of counceling about being co-dependant and at this time I have issues with AA/Al-non... but that does not mean it would not hurt you to check that out as well.
I know that look in someones eyes.... GOD does that one hurt cuz they are right, they did mess up and they do not live up to our expectations of what we know they can be. My ex-ABF even told me ... I will never be the man you want/need. He is probably right because he does not want to grow up and take responsibility. I just have to accept that and focus on my life. If he ever needs me, I would be there for him in a heart beat but he has to want that and nothing I do/say will change him. He does not want to be around me cuz I make him feel like he is screwing up... Maybe Im the only one he knows that is honest with him. BUT, for me I cant lie and pretend that he is ok, or doing great... he is not and if he asks me I will not lie about it...
If she wants to see truths, she will come to you. BUT you cant force that and they have to want to change....
I will pry for you.... stay strong and keep your Boundries in place. Kinda like raising a child... teach by example, it hurts to see them cry and in pain.... but in the long run its for the very best for both of you.