geeze dave. are you married to my wife? *sigh*
I can relate to a lot of what your gripes are i got the same gripes. A wife who is never interested and glued to her tablet etc.. I rarely even bother trying to go for the intimacy thing anymore its just another excuse. I got a bucket of excuses to drink shes got a bucket of them to not get intimate.
I can really carry on. But my wife has some good points. I'm sure yours does your still married etc. theres gotta be something to it.
I felt I had little support as well. 1 year came and went. 2 years came and went. 3 years came and went etc.. Not htat shes never acknowledged it and shes more supportive these days and she stopped suggesting I have a drink ions ago. But she fails to understand what i'm up against and that used to bother me but it doesnt anyore. Why? cuase shes not a drunk I am so how could she understand? If i want support I come here or AA etc.. not to person who doesnt suffer from the same disease.
I think you might need to put the blinders on with your gripes with your marriage. and focus on your sobriety. as your ready too you can address things in your marriage in baby steps.
I finally had the money discussion i'd been trying to have with my wife for ions but she'd always bury herself in her tablet and say "do we have to discuss this now?" as our financial ship crashes and burns in my mind. So in time things do get better.
..the dinner went well. I gave her the ring...she like'ed it..."Very Nice" in her words. I also presented her with 2 dozen long stem red roses, a box of candy...and a card, reaffirming my love for her.
You the man!! I'd love to be able to do stuff like that for my wife!!!
Like you however when i do nice things i'm hoping for fireworks and there usually isnt any. I guess its just life. It aint some romantic movie its reality i suppose? Maybe some ladies can chime in.
What did I get???...NOTHING ! No card. No gift...NOTHING !!! She never even said..."Happy Anniversary" ! Was I EXPECTING anything? YES!!!...maybe a stinking card...or a hug...and a kiss...and a "Happy Anniversary to you too,Sweety". Thats all !
I know you didnt give to get. But I see your point. In my case I never get it seems becuase we are always broke anyhow. But I agree a hug a kiss etc.. that woulda been nice huh?
Is my Marriage over???...and I have just not been informed of it yet ?
Absolutly not I dont think it has to be or is. BUT when you sober up things change. I will say that. theres a section in the big book on that. You will change you will see her differently. She will se eyou differently there is an adjustment period its normal its ok.