How can I stop feeling guilty?
AH has been in jail for about 3 weeks.
Had my phone number blocked so he can't call.
He has sent two very nice letters, and sent two very cute/nice letters to the kids. (yes, rcd 2nd letter today, telling me about his craving for methadone is GONE! His craving for alcohol has GONE! He knows his next stop is the graveyard if he ever picks up a bottle or drug again!) I want to sing Alleluia, but I can't. I want to say "praise the Lord", but I can't.
I haven't written him.
I haven't read the first letters he wrote to the kids. I did read today's letters to them because they were just sweet, simple "I miss you" "I Love you" letters he wrote to each of them, with a self-portrait.
In today's letter, he said he would like to come home. He is feeling so much better, narcotics are out of his system - first time in more than 3 years he hasn't been on narcotics!
I haven't visited him.
I haven't taken his kids to visit him.
Feeling guilty.
Feeling guilty for feeling guilty.